Sunday, November 8, 2009

Cold Feet

Everything is printed out, I have the video of the Matt Harding dance on my ipod, the flyer mock ups, the audio CDs made, and at this hour I'm getting a lot of doubt coming into my mind.

-what if the district manager laughs at me?
-what if he thinks it's not going to work?
-what if I completely fudge up my interview??
-what if I don't really believe what I am trying to sell?

Remember my first post- I'm not a waitress, I'm an artist! Well actually I'm not a salesman either. I've never done anything on this corporate scale before, and already my heart is racing and it's not even monday yet! The biggest thing that's been bugging me is do I really feel this in my heart, or am I just saying things to get attention? I really do believe in this company, in Friendly's. When I think about the company, I feel like I'm coming in to see a close friend over ice cream, and what's ironic about that statement is that I make the ice cream!

But I'm also a little nervous about the response from my fellow employees. Word got out recently that I am going to be meeting with the district manager on monday to share an "idea." They are ripping me up like it's middle school. One of the male waiters said while he was making his sunday "hey, I think I have an idea, why don't I call the district manager and meet with him, eh?" and when I fibbed up on my first table, one of the waitresses said "you sure about that idea?"

Nobody at the restaurant knows what the idea really is, but what if it doesn't work out? Will I not hear the end of it once they find out what it was? Or what if the idea does go through, and they make fun of me for doing it? Really...I think I'm going to be made fun of whether this works or not, so I need to just be strong and take it like a woman...a woman who is not in middle school! hahaha!

I suppose I could say these "what if's" for a long time, but I need to remember that there are a lot of loopy ideas that were laughed at and had amazing success! What is that song called? "They All Laughed" sung by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong. Here's a video that will explain what I mean:

Maybe it won't be so bad. I'll just say a prayer and hope for the best. Maybe things would work out, maybe not, but I think in my heart of hearts...I really want to put smiles on people's faces and make their day a little happier. I'm willing to be laughed at for a chance to make someone's day. To make a kid dance, to help others.
That is why I suppose, as a bachelor degree fine artist, chose to labor as a waitress.


The Spontaneous Waitress


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